One of the many purposes of art is to evoke emotion, promote creation in return, and to complete the loop of consumption. Halsey’s song ‘Heaven in Hiding’ off her new album hopeless fountain kingdom brought up the dichotomy of power and vulnerability that I feel is one of my most instinctive and unrefined drives.

I can put on a show

You don’t make me feel invincible.

People don’t make me feel invincible.

People make me feel fragile.

And I don’t like feeling fragile.

Fragility is too complicated and requires far too much care

At least more than I’m willing to admit I can afford to give.

I can put on a show

I’m naked in your presence. My clothes are on.

My fingers flicker and my voice wavers.

Your nails are digging into your palm. Your knuckles are white.

Time is abstract and I wish I had no understanding of it

The bass line of my heart rises in a crescendo

I can put on a show

I put an arm around you

I think about what I could say to you without telling a lie

You hold on to me tighter

And I keep quiet

I wouldn’t do anything for you.

I can put on a show

I didn’t learn that lesson in your living room

Instead it stays with me

Everytime I see that shopping list in your distinctive type

Or cycle past that picture perfect canal

I feel something

Not missing

But close.

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